State of My Pants (SOMP)

I hated today. I hated it slightly less than I hated yesterday, except for the last 45 minutes or so. Now I hate today as much as I hated yesterday, if not more. SHAME ON YOU, TODAY. SHAME ON YOU.

Today was the State of the Union. Sigh. The state of the union is NOT GOOD. And it appears that it will continue being NOT GOOD for a while. What I thought of the speech is unimportant to this blog because I don’t feel like talking much about politics right now. Take your discussion elsewhere, internets.

All right, so the state of my pants is not that great either. There hasn’t been much change in anything at all. I’m waiting for my new bank card to show up. I’m applying for jobs each day. I’m fighting, and mostly winning, a battle against running far, far away. NEVER TO BE HEARD FROM AGAIN~

The state of my pants is over-dramatic. I feel like I’m thirteen.

Also? GIVE ME ALL THE FRIED FOOD IN THE LAND. Seriously. Hand it over and no one gets hurt. I refuse to say that I’m “eating my feelings” because I don’t believe in giving food a moral value. You know why? BECAUSE IT DOESN’T EFFING HAVE ONE. There is no good food and there is no bad food. There is just food and it all has nutritional value. Even those gummy bears in your hand. Calories! Which can be converted into energy! Also, are you hungry? Do you want a cupcake? Or a stalk of broccoli? THEN EAT THEM. Life is too short to worry about what you’re putting in your mouth. Your value isn’t in the number on the scale or printed on the tag stitched into your britches. I mean, yeah, it feels like it is but guess what? There are so many people out there who don’t actually give a shit what you weigh or what size your pants are, and the ones that do are probably doucherockets anyway and you don’t need to waste your time on them.

AND WHILE WE’RE AT IT, CAN EVERYONE PLEASE STOP CONCERN TROLLING AND POLICING THE BODIES OF OTHER PEOPLE? I DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT MY HEALTH BECAUSE IT’S NONE OF YOUR GODDAMN BUSINESS. AND YES, MY ASS IS FAT THANK YOU FOR NOTICING.

The state of my pants is very fat! And also sexy.

I bought SUPER CHUNK yarn to knit a cowl for The BFF. I sat down before dinner to get it on the needles and joined and stuff, and then I ate dinner, and then I came back and knit for a row. Things seemed…odd. But I ignored it. I knit another row. AND THEN THINGS SEEMED VERY AFOOT D: So then I knit another row because hey, I’m smart like that. And then I realized I could not tolerate the absolute horridness of my creation and I frogged it. Now the yarn is cast on but I haven’t done anything else with it.

The state of my pants is crafty.

I’ve had a headache for a few days. I’m not sure why and today was dotted with jaw pain, which probably means I’m spending my time with my jaw clenched, which I do without noticing until it feels like my face is going to fall off.

The state of my pants is owwwwww :(

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Posted on January 25, 2011, in Adventures with Sparkle Pants, All about Sparkle Pants, Fat Pants, lolz, Pretty happy fun friends, Sparkle Pants gets crafty, Yum's the word. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. Good to see you blogging again, my dear.

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