Every single flipping time.
Hi there. My name is Sparkle Pants and I’m a tough bitch. I lost my tough bitchness for awhile but I’m determined to get it back so that my life can move forward instead of stagnating in this mire of hating myself and waking up depressed because hi! I’m still me.
Anycrap, tough bitches don’t find things at all adorable or charming and they certainly don’t melt when faced with new information or evidence that someone, anyone has been enjoying a tough bitch’s favorite place in the world. They just don’t. This is not how things operate. Tough bitches take note of the new information and move on while the information becomes discarded among all the other trivial things tough bitches don’t have time to think about.
Unless, of course, you are me and the mere sight of a Giants hat and some jackets in the backseat (mmmmm the backseat) makes you want to stab your eyes out with your cell phone because oh my GOD cuter could he be?
I hate you, you golf-playing, football-loving, SAN FRANCISCO-VISITING, LAWYER BITCH BOY!
I am a tough bitch. With a gooey caramel center.