And the thought that went through my mind…

I told my mom a few years ago that I would end up marrying someone who golfed because that would be the only way my dad would let me do something insane like actually get married.


My father will love him.


Posted on June 9, 2005, in All about Sparkle Pants, Boys are pretty, Sparkling family tree. Bookmark the permalink. Comments Off on And the thought that went through my mind….

  1. Hey if he’s any good…you could be a VERY VERY wealthy wife and spend your weekends sipping tea in the clubhouse. :0D

  2. But then…ew! She’d be one of THOSE wives. Who has cocktails down at the club. And then when her son brings home some awesome girl she’ll be like…”Ah yoh pahrents MEMBAHS dahling?” and she’ll say “No, my dad’s a writer.” And Rhonda’ll say “A writah? What on EARTH is THAHT?” And go back to her dirty martini, or whatever they drink in those places in which I have never been. She’ll turn into Mrs. Huntzberger. And THAT is a fate worse than death.

  3. I will NEVER be Mrs. Huntzberger. And if I were down at the club having tea, it would be a Long Island iced tea. Or I would force them to make me rum and cokes (easy on the coke). I would be the embarrassment of the club. He would divorce me for sullying his good name.

    Life would be GREAT.

  4. And THEN you could get all sorts of silly alimony payments and be able to write to your hearts content because everything would be paid for by your now ex Mr. Huntzberger!

  5. Hey. That’s not a bad idea. I could ship the kid off to Procter Academy in New Hampshire and spend all my time boozed-up, writing, and having a torrid affair with Howie.

    Right the hell on.

  6. Is there something in Diet Pepsi which makes one react more strongly to rum? Or is it something about having a sinus infection? Or is it that the rum has been under the bed and thus has been strengthened by the dark and inner-bottle fermentation?

  7. No fair! No fair! No fair!

    Oddly enough, a conversation we just had:

    Marc: You know what we need?
    Me: Alcohol and lots of it?

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